Seven habits

The win-win performance agreement clarifies expectations by making the following five elements very explicit: desired results, guidelines, resources, accountability, and consequences. Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood The fifth habit Is the habit of communication — one of the master skills in life, the key to building win-win relationships, the essence of professionalism. Doctors diagnose before they prescribe; top sales people pre-assess needs and sell solutions to problems, not products. We see the world as we are, not as it is. Our perceptions come out of our experiences. Most credibility problems begin with perception differences. To resolve these differences and to restore credibility, one must exercise empathy, seeking first to understand the point of view of the other person. Empathic listening is deeply therapeutic because it gives people “psychological air.” Once people are understood, they lower their defenses. Hammering emotionally rooted problems by probing is often counterproductive. Evaluation, sympathy, and advising are also ineffective as a means of gaining understanding and influence — but they may have value once the other person feels understood. Habit 6: Synerglze This is the habit of creative cooperation or teamwork. For those who have a win-win abundance mentality and exercise empathy, differences in any relationship can produce synergy, where the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. Synergy results from valuing differences by bringing different perspectives together in the spirit of mutual respect. People then feel free to seek the best possible alternative, often the “third alternative,” one that is substantially different and better than either of the original proposals. Synergy is the human resource approach to problem solving as opposed to a “please or appease” human relations approach. Insecure people tend to make others over in their own image, and surround themselves with people who think similarly. They mistake uniformity for unity, sameness for oneness. Real oneness means complementariness. Habit 7: Sharpen the Saw This is the habit of self-renewal. As the farmer in the fable learned from sad experience, success has two sides: the goose, which represents production capability, and the golden egg, the production of desired results. It is wise to keep both sides in balance, Yet when people get busy producing or “sawing,” they rarely take time to sharpen the saw because maintenance seldom pays dramatic immediate dividends. The habit of sharpening the saw regularly means having a balanced, systematic program for self-renewal in the four areas of our lives: physical, mental, emotional-social, and spiritual.

The win-win performance agreement clarifies expectations by making the following five elements very explicit: desired results, guidelines, resources, accountability, and consequences.

The fifth habit Is the habit of communication — one of the master skills in life, the key to building win-win relationships, the essence of professionalism. Doctors diagnose before they prescribe; top sales people pre-assess needs and sell solutions to problems, not products.

We see the world as we are, not as it is. Our perceptions come out of our experiences. Most credibility problems begin with perception differences. To resolve these differences and to restore credibility, one must exercise empathy, seeking first to understand the point of view of the other person. Empathic listening is deeply therapeutic because it gives people “psychological air.” Once people are understood, they lower their defenses.

Hammering emotionally rooted problems by probing is often counterproductive. Evaluation, sympathy, and advising are also ineffective as a means of gaining understanding and influence — but they may have value once the other person feels understood.

This is the habit of creative cooperation or teamwork. For those who have a win-win abundance mentality and exercise empathy, differences in any relationship can produce synergy, where the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. Synergy results from valuing differences by bringing different perspectives together in the spirit of mutual respect. People then feel free to seek the best possible alternative, often the “third alternative,” one that is substantially different and better than either of the original proposals.

Synergy is the human resource approach to problem solving as opposed to a “please or appease” human relations approach. Insecure people tend to make others over in their own image, and surround themselves with people who think similarly. They mistake uniformity for unity, sameness for oneness. Real oneness means complementariness.

This is the habit of self-renewal. As the farmer in the fable learned from sad experience, success has two sides: the goose, which represents production capability, and the golden egg, the production of desired results.

It is wise to keep both sides in balance, Yet when people get busy producing or “sawing,” they rarely take time to sharpen the saw because maintenance seldom pays dramatic immediate dividends.

The habit of sharpening the saw regularly means having a balanced, systematic program for self-renewal in the four areas of our lives: physical, mental, emotional-social, and spiritual.